Why people bully
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Measure content performance. Develop and improve products. List of Partners vendors. Why do kids bully others? In order to help both bullies and their targets, it's important to understand bullying behavior. But to do so, adults need to move past the usual assumptions say, that all bullies are loners or lack self-esteem. Research shows that the reasons behind bullying can run the gamut from lack of impulse control and anger management issues to revenge and a longing to fit in.
Knowing more about why bullies do what they do can guide the way this behavior is addressed. Teens who want to be in control or have power are prone to bullying. This may be because they do not feel any power in their own life, which makes obtaining it in social interactions more appealing.
These teens may prefer to only interact with others when it is on their terms. If things do not go their way, they may resort to bullying. Tweens and teens engaging in relational aggression often called "mean girl" behavior also may be seeking power. Despite the prevalence of the "mean girl" trope in our culture, girls aren't the only ones who bully by using gossip, put-downs, social pressure, exclusion, and other indirect social tactics to pursue social dominance. In fact, research shows that boys are just as likely to engage in relational aggression as girls.
Athletes and physically strong students or kids with other types of perceived power may resort to bullying because of the power they have over weaker or smaller students. Additionally, some athletes bully each other in an attempt to eliminate competition on the team. Sometimes, bullying can be a manifestation of social status.
Kids who are popular often make fun of kids who are less popular by perpetuating relational aggression. Popularity also can lead kids to spread rumors and gossip, engage in slut-shaming, and ostracize others.
Meanwhile, kids who are trying to climb the social ladder at school or gain some social power may resort to bullying to get attention. They also might bully others to diminish the social status of another person. Some teens who have been victims of bullying to look for ways to retaliate or to seek revenge.
These kids are often referred to as "bully-victims," and they often feel justified in their actions because they too have been harassed and tormented. They may feel weak, ashamed or frightened it will make the situation worse. Signs your child is possibly being bullied include:. Bullying can affect your mental health at any age. It can lead to loneliness , anxiety and depression in children.
People who are bullied in the workplace have a higher risk than others of experiencing depression and having suicidal thoughts. Remember, you have a right to feel safe and be treated with fairness and respect. Find out more about your rights on the Australian Human Rights Commission website. If bullying is not challenged and stopped, it can contribute to a culture where bullying is tolerated and everyone feels powerless to stop it.
Your employer has a legal responsibility to provide a safe workplace, and a duty of care when it comes to your health and wellbeing at work. You can find information about bullying at school on the Bullying No Way! Do you prefer languages other than English? Health Translations offers translated factsheets on bullying:.
Learn more here about the development and quality assurance of healthdirect content. By being aware of the signs of bullying and knowing the best ways to tackle the problem, you can help your child deal with bullying before it gets out of hand. Read more on myDr website. It's good to know you have a choice on how to respond to bullying in the heat of the moment. ReachOut shares ways to deal with bullying. Read more on ReachOut. When an individual feels this way, they may engage in bullying to bring others down to their perceived level.
Similarly, when an individual feels powerless in their own life, it may trigger bullying. The person feels powerful when intimidating others. This is why many children from dysfunctional homes engage in bullying. Someone who struggles with feeling insecure is afraid of appearing weak in front of others.
To hide their own weakness, they do their best to find and expose weakness in someone else. This is all to take the attention off of themselves and make themselves feel better by acting more powerful than others. Again, this explanation and the others below are not meant to excuse bullying — which is inexcusable — but is meant to explain it.
When we understand something, we are more equipped to change it. The need to control is one of the top reasons why people bully, and there can be many reasons why a person needs to feel more in control.
Some people engage in bullying to gain control of their surroundings. For example, they may have no control over the way they are treated at home. Alternatively, they may have issues with anxiety. Bullying behavior is often rewarding because the person who does it gets what they want. Every time a person who bullies wins and succeeds in getting what they want, it reinforces their behavior. When they control and intimidate others, they usually achieve what they set out to do: intimidate and control.
Bullies can also have their behavior rewarded if others encourage them and join in. In fact, it just becomes a vicious cycle of negative behaviours. They are more likely to come from larger families and are more likely to live with people other than their biological parents.
There are often feelings of rejection from the very people who should love them unconditionally. They are also much more likely to come from violent households with lots of arguments and hostility. Without access to education, hate-based conversation directed at others may be the norm. They may not understand what hate speech is and why speaking about people in a derogatory way is not appropriate. In order to keep friendships, they might be pressured by their peers to behave in a certain way.
Carry on reading with our article on overcoming bullying. If you are doing the bullying, here are 7 things that you can do to overcome it. If you are looking for more help — our community is a safe space to discuss your issues and get support from trained digital mentors who will help you without judgement.
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